Tuesday, October 24, 2006

Christian Sex Help...

I came across this little pearl of a PR statement today and it was just what I needed after the whole scientology trauma...

I never knew but apparently christians are not good at sex. This might surprise most of us as they seem to be everywhere, but there you are... And of course somebody has stepped up to the aid of these sex starved christians and started a website.

I quote:
"Irwin, a sexual researcher and author, says that many Christian marriages are struggling because of poor sex. He states, “A lack of understanding of sex and sexuality is having a tremendously negative impact on Christian marriages. Christians desperately need resources for making their married sex lives as exciting, passionate and uninhibited as God intended them to be.”

I see. Irwin obviously has had some intimate conversations with God on the subject.

"He says, “God created sex primarily for our pleasure and secondarily to strengthen our marriage relationship…Sex within a Christian marriage should be sensual, intimate and uninhibited.”

Really? That's a new one to me. I always thought it was to make more souls...


Well, I am always happy to help out and more than willing to contribute to this issue. As much of an atheist as I am I do believe that much of the frustration and anger one so often encounters in christians is probably due to a less than satisfactory sex life. Maybe if we can tire these christians enough they will listen to reason a bit better...

Anyway, let's see what the bible has to say on the subject:


Sarah, who is about 90 years old and has gone through menopause, laughs at God when he tells her that she will have a son. She asks God if she will "have pleasure" with her "Lord" [Abraham], when both are so very old. God assures her that he will return and impregnate her at the appointed time. 18:11-14

Lot refuses to give up his angels to the perverted mob, offering his two "virgin daughters" instead. He tells the bunch of angel rapers to "do unto them [his daughters] as is good in your eyes." This is the same man that is called "just" and "righteous" in 2 Pet.2:7-8. 19:8

Lot and his daughters camp out in a cave for a while. The daughters get their "just and righteous" father drunk, and have sexual intercourse with him, and each conceives and bears a son (wouldn't you know it!). Just another wholesome family values Bible story. 19:30-38

Jacob goes in unto Leah by mistake. 29:23, 25 (there were no websites to help him...)


If you "lie" with your wife and your mother-in-law (now that sounds fun!), then all three of your must be burned to death. 20:14

2 Samuel

Ammon (David's son) says to his half-sister Tamar, "Come lie with me, my sister." But she resists, so he rapes her and then sends her away. Tamar, knowing that she now belongs to him (since she was a virgin), expects him to marry her, but he refuses. 13:1-22

Paul explains that "the natural use" of women is to act as sexual objects for the pleasure of men. 1:27 :

I could go on but if you want to read all of it the most excellent


has got is all...


At 4:29 PM, Anonymous say no to christ said...

I couldn't agree more! Lol Christians are extremely sexually repressed. If you ever want a good laugh, go to a christian blog and bring up sex. All the huffing a puffing just cracks me up.

At 11:23 PM, Anonymous Love the Lord... said...

I am a married Christian and my wife and I have great, passionate, uninhibited sex all of the time. We didn't need a website's advice. Stereotypes don't prove points.


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